Well, tomorrow is the big day! I'm nervous, but have spent the last couple of hours at dinner with some of my amazing family and am in a really good place right now. Thanks, Mom, Aunt Pam, Aunt Renee, Russell, Liz, Eric, Paige, Sarah and Zac for having dinner with me and making me laugh. I am happy that I introduced you to guava mojitos and thankful that Sarah can eat almost as much guacamole as I can.
Mom brought her cat up here today because she is planning on staying for several weeks. To say that this cat is high-strung would be an understatement. He's half-Siamese, a little cross-eyed, and very vocal about his displeasure of moving. He hid under the couch for the first few hours that he was here, and has now made his way underneath the tree skirt of the Christmas tree. This would normally not be a problem except that my tree is precariously perched atop a box to make it taller. I keep expecting to hear a giant crash and a cat wailing. I guess we made him this way when we named him Testes Kensington Lancaster. Any cat with a name like that is almost guaranteed to have anxiety problems. (He was given this unique moniker because he was born completely white and within a couple of months had developed very large, very black male cat parts. And his wayward roaming father belonged to the neighboring Lancasters. And every proper cat needs a distinguished middle name like Kensington.) For the record, his name at the vet's office is Boo Radley and Mom only calls him Boo. (He got the name Boo Radley because he looked just like Boo Radley in the movie "To Kill a Mockingbird." Do you remember when Robert Duvall came out from behind the door? He had those crazy eyes and was so pale? That's exactly what this cat looks like all the time.)
Enough about the cat. I realized tonight that I hadn't really given too many details about the actual procedure. What they will do tomorrow is make a couple of incisions and remove most of my breast tissue. They cannot get all of the breast tissue, but they will get most of it. They are doing the nipple saving technique, for which I'm very thankful. They will put in expanders at the time of the surgery with a little saline injected, so I won't be totally without fullness. They also put in a "mesh" piece that will become part of my body within a few months. I will have two sets of drains, which will look like bulbs at the end of tubes. These drains will be safety-pinned to my Ace bandage, and have to be emptied two times a day. Thank goodness my mom isn't squeamish! I will have one set of drains removed on December 6th, and the others removed the next week. I can't shower for a long time. This bothers me. I did buy some dry shampoo so maybe I won't look too much like a greaser. Maybe I should start growing some dreadlocks. Anyway, every 7-10 days I will go back to see Dr. Stacey and he will inject more saline into my expanders. Eventually, in about three to four months, I will have another surgery to get the final implants and to make sure every looks like it should. I'm choosing to look at this surgery like a really long boob job. I'm blessed to have doctors who are concerned with saving my life AND making sure that I look good when I live it. Vain? Probably. But I've spent the last year feeling really bad about myself and my body, and I don't want to do that anymore. It may be vain but I'm excited to look good. So, tomorrow begins my long process of healing, both mentally and physically.
I have so many people to thank and I'm afraid that I'll forget someone. Mostly, I want to thank everyone who has been so kind and supportive. Your kind words and actions mean sooooo much to me. Also, thanks to Maxilea, Pam, and Paige for the awesome blanket, books, pj pants, jackets and warmer. My brother couldn't be marrying into a better family! Thanks to Renee for the card--I love mail and I love gift cards and I'm going to buy something fun and wear it in Charleston. Thanks to Jean Mallett for the basket of fun goodies! Thanks to Sam's Club (not the store) for the friendship and the awesome banana bread. Thanks to cousin Katie for the furry footies and book. Most of all, thanks to everyone who has texted or called with kind thoughts and promises of prayers. I'm so blessed.
Ok, I'll update when I'm out of a drug-induced haze! Talk to you all very soon!
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