Men are from Mars

It's been a couple of weeks since I've written, mainly because I've been doing a lot of writing for work and haven't felt like doing it when I come home.  I've had several people send me emails or texts about the blog, and it really feels great to know that my friends and family are reading it.  I've had some comments about how it's apparently difficult to "follow" or comment.  I have no idea how to fix that.  Sorry.  Thanks for everyone who is reading and sending me messages or emails in response.  If I figure out how to make it easy to comment, I'll let you know.  Also, the screen apparently is really big or really small depending on the computer that you're using.  I don't know how to fix that either.  Sorry again!  Finally, someone commented that my blog subjects aren't cohesive and I kind of skip around from topic to topic.  To that, I say sorry, but I'm using this blog not only to keep people informed, but also to get some of these crazy thoughts out of my head.  So yes, I may write about cancer on one post and knitting on another; I'm not trying to be published.  Yet.

On to the real stuff...

Many people, mostly women, have asked what made me initially go see a doctor and how I knew that this was something other than just a hormone-induced cyst.  Basically, I found a lump that was really close to the skin.  It felt different.  I can't explain it much better.  I know that people would like to know exactly what made it feel different, but I can't really explain.  I just urge you to see a doctor if you find anything  Just in case.

My surgery is in a couple of weeks and I'm getting really nervous.  I'm also getting a little overwhelmed with trying to get all of my work stuff taken care of for this month and next month.  Thankfully, I have some really great people at my office who help me and haven't even made me feel badly for piling a lot of extra work on them.

It's interesting how different people have reacted when they found out about all of this.  Generally, the women have reacted with total support of any and all of my decisions and have asked questions about how and when.  They never questioned my need for secrecy at first and even if they didn't, they acted like they understood.  The males in the group have all reacted differently.  Some guys got that scared, glazed over look that some guys get when they hear something that's uniquely female.  They just mumbled, "just let me know if you need anything," and would occasionally ask if I'm ok, with their fear that I would answer with details about my breasts written all over their faces.  (I always wanted to say the word "nipple" to these guys, just to see them turn bright red and squirm.)  Others very vocally offered their opinion about how I should handle things, including how I should tell everyone I know.  These guys did not understand that I needed to keep this information among a small group of people, and had no problem telling me that I was wrong to do that.  I just found it very interesting that men and women reacted so differently.  I always wanted to ask the males who had such strong opinions that if the situation was reversed, and they were having biopsies and tests run on, let's say their testicles, if they would want the world to know.  "Oh hey, sorry I'm a little quiet today, I just had a giant needle attached to a vacuum cleaner suck tissue out of my testicles."  Or "I need that court date moved because I'm going to spend the morning standing in a room with five strangers while one of them smashes my manbits in between two pieces of plastic and takes pictures."

Speaking of, I've always heard female members of my family say that a man must have invented mammogram machines, because no woman would ever invent something so painful.  Seriously, why hasn't that thing been outlawed yet?